From Tradegy to Triumph
From Tragedy to Truimph
Life has a way of testing our faith through unexpected tragedies and overwhelming circumstances. When devastating news arrives and our world turns upside down, we face a crucial choice: will we trust God's character even when we cannot understand His ways? Through the journey of losing a beloved wife to cancer and facing life-threatening complications during a high-risk pregnancy, profound lessons emerge about finding victory in the midst of storms rather than waiting for them to pass.
True victory is discovered not in favorable outcomes, but in maintaining Christ's peace during life's most challenging moments. This peace, which enabled Jesus to walk on water and surrender His will on the cross, is available to us in our darkest hours. The battle we face isn't to create peace, but to fight to stay in the rest that God offers. When anxiety grips our hearts and fear threatens to overwhelm, we must bring every thought into submission to God's Word and choose to trust His character over our circumstances.
Our peace is directly connected to our belief system. If our problems seem greater than our faith, we will live in crisis. But when our belief system exceeds our problems, we can enter God's rest and trust that He is working all things together for good. God's thoughts are infinitely higher than ours, and while we may not understand His ways, we can trust His character. The church becomes a lifeline during difficult seasons, and eternity remains closer than we think, making our relationship with Jesus the most important decision we will ever make.
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Finding Peace in Life's Greatest Storms: A Journey Through Grief and Faith
Life has a way of testing our faith in ways we never expect. When tragedy strikes and our world is turned upside down, we're faced with a choice: will we trust God's character even when we can't understand His ways? This message explores how to find victory not after the storm, but right in the middle of it.
When Life Doesn't Go According to Plan
In 2020, a devastating phone call changed everything. The news that a beloved wife had ovarian cancer began an 18-month journey through chemotherapy, surgery, and ultimately, saying goodbye. But this story isn't just about loss - it's about discovering God's grace in the darkest valleys.
The journey became even more complex when, just days after the funeral, their pregnant daughter faced life-threatening complications. At 20 weeks pregnant, she was told she had 48 hours to decide between her life and her baby's life. The medical system labeled the baby as "just a fetus" - not viable, not a person.
But God had different plans. Baby Olive Sue Grace was born at 26 weeks, weighing only 790 grams. Today, she's a healthy, spirited four-year-old who wants to be a doctor.
What Does Victory Really Look Like?
Victory Is Found in Peace, Not in Outcomes
Many people believe victory comes when the storm is over. But true victory is found in maintaining peace during the storm. "'Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid'" - John 14:27 New Living Translation (NLT).
This isn't just any peace - it's Christ's own peace. The same peace that enabled Him to walk on water, call Peter out of the boat, and say "not my will, but yours be done" on the cross. This peace is available to us in our darkest moments.
The Fight to Stay at Rest
"'Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus'" - Philippians 4:6-7 New Living Translation (NLT).
The battle isn't to create peace - it's to stay in the peace God offers. When anxiety grips your heart and fear threatens to overwhelm, the fight is to labor to enter His rest. This requires bringing every thought into submission to God's Word.
Who Do You Believe When Everything Falls Apart?
Your Peace Is Attached to Your Belief System
When facing crisis, we often look to doctors, experts, or circumstances for hope. But lasting peace comes from knowing God's character. If your problem is greater than your belief system, you'll be in crisis. If your belief system equals your problem, you'll struggle. But if your belief system is greater than your problem, you'll enter His rest.
Understanding God's Sovereignty
"'For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,' declares the Lord. 'As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts'" - Isaiah 55:8-9 New Living Translation (NLT).
God's thoughts are infinitely higher than ours. Even our loftiest reasoning falls short of understanding His ways. This isn't meant to frustrate us - it's meant to bring us to a place of trust in His character rather than our understanding.
The Church Shines Brightest in Dark Times
During the most difficult seasons, the church becomes a lifeline. The meals, phone calls, texts, and prayers from God's people provide supernatural strength. If you've been hurt by the church, remember that Jesus gave His life for her. We're all broken people on a journey, but together we reflect His love in powerful ways.
God Is Always Working for Your Good
"'And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them'" - Romans 8:28 New Living Translation (NLT).
This isn't a throwaway scripture - it's a profound truth. God takes ALL things - the good, the bad, the bitter, the sweet, the health, the sickness, the life, and the death - and works them together for good. He doesn't cause the bad things, but He can take them and create something beautiful.
The key phrase is "He is working" - present tense. God isn't finished with your story. Like ingredients in a cake, individual elements might taste terrible alone, but when combined and put through the heat, something beautiful emerges.
Eternity Is Closer Than You Think
In those final eight hours, surrounded by family, there was worship, gratitude, and peace. The room was filled with God's presence as a wife, mother, and grandmother transitioned from this life to eternity. She knew exactly where she was going because she knew Jesus.
We take our next breath by the grace of God. This life is just a prequel to the real life we'll live with Him. The question isn't whether you'll face eternity - it's whether you'll face it with confidence, knowing you belong to Him.
Life Application
This week, identify one area where you've been fighting for control instead of fighting to stay at rest. Whether it's a health concern, relationship issue, financial stress, or family situation, practice bringing your anxious thoughts to God and choosing to trust His character over your circumstances.
Ask yourself these questions:
Where am I looking for peace outside of God's presence?
What "ingredients" in my life am I judging individually instead of trusting God to work them together?
How can I labor to enter His rest this week instead of laboring to solve everything myself?
Am I confident about where I'll spend eternity, and if not, what's holding me back from surrendering to Jesus?
Remember, victory isn't found when the storm ends - it's found in the peace that guards your heart while you're still in the storm. God's grace is sufficient for every season, and His thoughts are higher than yours. Trust His character, even when you can't understand His ways.
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A discussion guide for the sermon can be found here.
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Okay, I'm going to share. Who loves the movie like a tragedy to triumph type movies, you know, always looking for the rainbow at the end of the tragedy. My story I'm about to share is a bit of a tragedy to triumph story. It's.
It's a personal testimony. It is filled with the grace and the wonder of God and it's filled with a person, me, who went on a journey in questioning God over a whole lot of things that happened in, you know, five years ago. And there is great reward at the other side of it in the fact that I have my wife here with me, which I'll share in a moment. But in 2020, just. Just a quick background.
I've been in ministry for 30 years. Been involved in. Started as a youth pastor, worship pastor. Ended up, I was in Newcastle, grew up there, did a music degree, taught High school and then God rescued the children from me and took me out of that and went into ministry. Got called down to South Australia to work with Pastor Danny Gulgamucci as his worship pastor for 20 years, and then also took over all the business management while I was there, which is really crazy that you give a worship pass to the business management.
We got a really good PA and a really good lighting and everything else is the result anyway, but money. Joking. But, you know, my. My prerequisite of being the business manager was I also count to four, you know, one, two, three. Anyway, gee, it's really quiet up the back there, so.
So as a result, ended up working there and I brought my family down and we've just served God for many years. I was married to my late wife for 37 years. And I'm going to talk about the tragedy and the journey of what it was like losing my wife. And for some of you, you sit here thinking, I've got my new wife sitting on the front. We've journeyed all of this together.
She's been amazing to me. Like, I think she married. She married a wreck and she's been a counselor to me and she's incredibly. She's been God's gift, honestly. So I'm going to share with you that story.
And so it started in 2020 when I got a phone call from my wife's doctor. There's a picture of her on screen, my wife's doctor, to tell me the news that it looks like sue has ovarian cancer.
From February the next month through to April, she went through chemotherapy. And then the following month, in May, she went through a major operation, which is debulking, they call it debulking the tumors that were there. Sadly, they didn't get everything. The tumors had masticized into the pleural cavity of her lung and that caused a whole lot of complications. And she continued on chemotherapy.
But In June of 2021, we celebrated her life at her funeral. And, you know, it was a journey. The interesting. Not the interesting part, the added, added stress of all of this was my daughter Grace, who came down for her mum's, not just for funeral. She came.
She knew she was in hospital. She came several weeks beforehand. She was 20 weeks pregnant. Pregnant. And then four days after Sue's funeral, she got rushed to hospital.
She started fainting and bleeding and she had major hemorrhages and she went to the hospital, she had three blood transfusions. And the good news was the baby was safe. But Grace's life was in danger. And now understand you just buried her mum. Just buried my wife.
And this is happening now. And we didn't think how much worse could it get. Well, this is what happened in the hospital. The doctor walked in. She was a junior doctor.
She walked in and this is nearly word verbatim what she said. You have 48 hours to decide whether you're going to abort or keep the baby. Understand the baby was 20 weeks and according to medical terms, she wasn't vice Bible. She was, she was only a fetus, she wasn't a person. And she said, we are not going to give you any more blood transfusions, quote unquote, as there are other people more important who need it.
Yes, this is, this is an Australian hospital.
I live three kilometers away. I was, I was down there immediately. I found my daughter in a fetal position in her bed being told it's either your life or your baby's life. And not even able to grieve the process of her mother just passing. Nevertheless, the possibility of her daughter passing.
Long story short, she did survive to 26 weeks. And it was amazing. At 23 weeks, all of a sudden everything changed with the doctors. She's now viable, she's now a person as compared to a fetus, which don't start me on that journey. But as the clock struck midnight, all of a sudden everything changed.
And baby Olive Sue Grace was born at 26 weeks gestation and she was 790 grams on the right. To give you an idea of how small she is, you can see the fingers there, but that's ring around her little arm. There was her dad's wedding ring. So if you look at her wedding ring, you see how small she was.
I'm not telling you this story to create an atmosphere of morbidity or faithlessness or for you to feel sorry for us because this is actually a grace filled message. But the reality is every one of us in this room face issues. We all go through tough times. We all go through difficult times. Some of you would have faced and can relate to the story that I'm telling because maybe a loved one, you've had to journey a loved one through this situation as well.
But my encouragement to you today is that God knows and God cares and there is triumph on the other side of this if you are prepared to go on the journey with God. Yes, there are a lot of. There's a lot of pain, there is a lot of grief. And I'm not a grief counselor, but I've realized that Grief is her own person and she can't be told what to do. And she will come and visit you when you're not expecting it, but you just have to allow the journey of grief to take its place.
I've learned that grief is actually your friend. She actually is trying to. I call her a person, but she's trying to help you to move on so that you can. You can live with a level of hope in your life as you grieve the loss of your partner or your loved one. So my encouragement to you today is that God is good.
And God is a person that loves every moment and he is in every detail, he loves us unconditionally. I'm not here to give you answers as to why this has happened, because the truth is, I don't have an answer. I don't. Can I say, is it answered on this side or is it answer over here? It's an answer here.
I lived in New. I grew up in Newcastle and got in trouble for saying all of the wrong words in South Australia. So I'm sort of as South Australianized now. So I don't have the answer. Right.
I don't have it. And I say that with a level of angst because the truth is, I wish I did have the answers because if I give you the answers, it would actually help you. Right. But the truth is, it wouldn't help your faith. And I'll talk about that in a moment.
Right. I just know this. His grace is sufficient. His grace is sufficient in every season. Not the little ones or the not so caring, the most difficult circumstances.
His grace is sufficient. And it is for every season. I am far more aware. I'm far more aware of his presence and his kindness in my life than I ever was before. I see God in the little things that I never realized before, that I.
That I just took for granted. But God was working all of those things together in my life. You know, on the fun side of things, right? There was a lot of good things. I could leave my clothes on the floor and not get in trouble.
I could have the TV as loud as I wanted to in the bedroom. I could pack the dishwasher the way I wanted to. Ladies, there is no right way to pack a dishwasher. Dishwasher. Now I've lost half of you.
I don't know where the instructions for dishwasher packing come, but it seems like every woman has the way to pack a dishwasher. Right, men? You know what I'm talking about? Yeah, it was actually, but that Was it was peaceful in that area, but it wasn't the peace I needed. Also realized the clothesline was way too short for me.
And anyway, there was a whole lot of new experiences. You know, I jest, but I want to give you some just simple things that I learned but are profound that I learned in this journey of grief and also the journey of seeing my wife move to eternity. Number one, peace is the ultimate place of victory. Peace is the ultimate place of victory. Many would say that peace is found when you've come through the storm.
Many would say that victory is found when it's all over. If I could just get through this, I'll be at peace. If I could just get through this, I'll have victory. I used to say to our church, who loves a great victory, who loves a great victory, well, get ready for a great war, because you never have a great victory without a great war, right? We like the great victory side, but we don't actually talk about this side and what you've got to walk through to actually proclaim that victory in your life.
But I'm going to tell you, unlike what people you see in the movies, victory is actually in. God is found in the middle of the war. It's found in the middle of the storm, not at the end the of. Of it. Philippians 4, 6, 7 says this.
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything, by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be known and made to God and the peace of God. I want to reiterate, not your peace, not your version of peace, not what you think peace is. It's what God's peace is. Peace of God will surpass all understanding. In other words, you won't even have a clue why you feel the way you do.
It will guard your heart like a garrison, the amplified version. It's like a garrison of angels around your heart to guard you and keep you in that place of peace. It will guard your hearts and your minds through. Through Christ Jesus. In this journey from the 18 months out when we found out to the day my wife passed away, we had communion every night.
Sometimes that communion was trying to twist God's arm to give us a healing God. Can't you see we're meeting you every night? We deserve this. But we learned that that doesn't do anything to God because our. Our acts are like filthy rags to him.
We cannot earn. We cannot earn the favor. We have the favor, but we can't do anything to change God's will and purpose for our life. It's the process of submitting to his will and purpose that if we do that, there's actually joy in the middle of the storm and there's peace in the middle of the storm. So we had anxious thoughts often, and the enemy would try and trip us up often.
There were moments with great anxiety and great concern, if that's a word. But I remember when I first found out, going to my study and looking up Dr. Google to find out what all of this meant. And as I read, I felt. I don't know if you ever had this, but I felt the adrenaline. Adrenaline, like, gripping my heart to the point where I couldn't breathe.
My heart was just like. It felt like it was enlarged coming out of my chest with the pain I was feeling as I was reading what the possible prognosis could be of my wife with this cancer and the fact that she had it in her pleural cavity. And I remember I couldn't hardly breathe. I had to stop and take three or four big, deep breaths and then go out and see my wife, who's lying on the lounge, out in the lounge room, and come out with a level of hope and faith, right? But I've been gripped with fear and anxiety.
We went through a whole lot of chemotherapy. We went through all sorts of meetings with the doctors, et cetera, and the enemy tries to work on every little area. I started to realize that I was looking for the doctor to get some hope from him to what the future could be. And it's amazing when you're given this death sentence and you walk into the doctor who's actually treating your wife, and you're not just even listening to the answers he's giving. You're listening to the nuances and inflections in his voice as to whether there's hope coming out of his answers as compared to, you know, to just a dry, logical answer you're looking for.
You're looking for something to pin hope on when you walk out so you feel better about when you left and when you came, came. You also realize that the questions you ask and you realize the questions, they're not prepared to answer. You go through all of those things and the anxiety, you're just looking, looking, looking. Is there somewhere I can pin some hope?
Jesus led me to this scripture found in John 14:27. Because the enemy is out there to rob you. And the thing he wants to rob you of is your hope in Christ. He wants to rob you of your place of peace. And John 4:27 says, this peace I leave with you this next little part of the verse got me.
My peace I give you.
Think about that. Jesus has peace that he wants to infuse into your life. If you're going through a difficult circumstance, a difficult situation, a rough time right now, I want to tell you there is peace that Jesus himself has that he wants to infuse into your soul. His peace. It's the type of peace that aided him to walk on the water and call Peter out of the boat.
The peace that he had even when he went to the cross, he said, not my will, but yours be done. That type of peace, that level of peace, he wants to infuse it. He's my peace, it's his that he gives you. And he says, I don't give you the peace that the world tries to give you. So don't let your hearts be troubled and don't be afraid.
Paraphrase. Because my peace I want to give you. My peace I want to give you. I'm not saying it was easy, it was hard. To stay in peace was something we had to fight for.
The fight was to stay at rest. The fight was to stay at peace. Because everything around us was trying us to get. Trying to get to the point where we weren't at peace. So when I say victory is found in peace, what am I talking about?
Victory. It's not the victory of. Because the world will say, well, victory is a healthy, prosperous life. Life. Victory is staying.
I'll tell you, it's staying in peace no matter what the circumstances. Too many people think and too many Christians think, if I live a trouble free life, then God is with me.
Even those around you who are unsafe see you go through difficult times, say, well, what sort of God do you serve? If you go through stuff like that, they've got a warped view of what God is.
You don't have to read what happened in Paul's life to realize that there's got to be trouble in life. Like he was shipwrecked, he was whipped, he was jailed, he was beaten with rods, he was kicked out of cities, he was wrongly accused. All sorts of things happened to him. As far as I know, he was a pretty good Christian.
So why would we expect any different? I want to tell you victory is choosing. It's a decision to believe and trust in God in spite of the circumstances. You know, your peace is attached to your belief.
The question is, what do you believe and who do you believe? Because when in a situation like this, I found myself trying to get something out of the doctors, out of the out of the medical profession, right? Because they're the experts in trying to get some level of hope from them to rest my belief on. Dr. Ray Andrews is a good friend of mine, rang me and said this to me one day. He said, steve, if your problem is greater than your belief system, you'll be in crisis.
If your belief system is equal to your problem, you'll struggle. But get this. However, if your belief system is great greater than the problem, you'll enter into his rest.
Where's your belief system?
Because Jesus came to deal with unbelief. Do you remember in Mark, chapter nine, there was a father who came with his son who was sick and he said, if you will, will you heal him? And Jesus said, I will heal him if you only believe. And his response was remarkable. What an incredibly honest response.
He said, help me with my unbelief. I could tell you there was days I was saying, jesus, help me with my unbelief. Help me with my unbelief. Help me to stay in faith. Because as a leader of my home and leading my wife, I didn't want to ever bring a level of crisis to her.
I was trying to say unhoped, but that's not really a word, is it? You know what I'm saying. I just didn't want her to actually flounder. I wanted to keep her in a place of faith and speak life over her and life over the situation.
Hebrews 4, 10, 11. Great Scripture. Let us labor. Can I give you the Australian version? Let us work our flipping booty off.
To enter into that rest. It's going to cost you effort keeping your mind clear, keeping your mind set on the word of God, confessing the word of God over your life. Let us labor therefore to enter into that rest, lest any man fall after the same example of unbelief.
This is the core of the message. Who do you believe? Who are we going to put your faith in? I've realized that the fight to enter the rest of God is simply about believing in the character of God above what you see in front of you.
Side note, have you ever, you know, you've invited a friend over and you know them so well and they're late. Have you ever said this? It's not like them to be late.
It's not like them to not call. Therefore there must be something wrong. Because I know their character so well that they're a person of their word, that they said they would be here at 7:30 they will be here, right? So we trust Their character. Right?
And we don't judge their character if they're late. We just think there's something wrong because they wouldn't do that. Right when Jesus said he's gonna do it, he's gonna do it.
When Jesus said, or the Word says, be anxious for nothing and the peace of God will come and guard your heart. But he's going to do that. You don't have to worry about whether it is, whether it might or might not happen. It's going to happen. But our job is to fight, labor, bring everything into submission to the word of God, to stay at that place of rest so that victory will be found in the middle of the storm.
Another thing that happened to me personally as a preacher, my preaching came back to haunt me.
I used to always preach this, you know, being a come on, everybody. I was trying to stir the church up and be the good pastor. I would say things like this, God knows, therefore I don't need to. That's true. God knows, therefore I don't need to.
Until you face a situation where you really want to to know. Because I realized at that point, I actually am a control freak.
I should have preached. God knows, and he needs to tell me.
Because our makeup is that we actually want to know so that we can tell God. That's all right. Do that.
I remember as a young person, God, tell me your will for my life. What am I going to do? I just want you give me your will for my life, and I've got nothing.
Because the truth is, if he said, I want you to go to India to be a missionary, I would say, no, no, no, no, no. Wrong God.
Are you with me? Me? What I was really saying is, God, tell me your will for my life so I can check it out to make sure it's okay. And I'll let you do that because ultimately we are control freaks and we can pray all these prayers in vain. Beautiful, you know, submissive legs.
Oh, Jesus, I just want you know your will for my life. Hallelujah. No, you don't.
You don't. Not really. Really.
It's true. And in this process, I learned something powerful about the sovereignty of God.
Because truthfully, we often live our life with God as treating him like God Almighty instead of God Almighty, mighty. We treat him like he's our buddy and he walks alongside us, protecting us from all harm and gives us a good life. He's our mate instead of his God Almighty. And I think what's missing from the church and I know what happened in my life is a good. A good dose of reverent fear of God, that God is not someone to be mocked.
So these are the scriptures that I read, and they hurt me. But God was showing me to be a father. And for some of you, this is going to hurt you too. But it's truth, and it put everything back into perspective. Isaiah 55, 8, 9.
For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are my ways your ways, declares the Lord, even as high as the heavens are from the earth, so are my ways. Higher than your ways are my thoughts. Thoughts are higher than your thoughts. As far as the heavens are above the earth. He thinks he has the power to think so much more different than me.
And I realized it doesn't matter what education I've got, who I speak to, what process I went through, what reasoning I went through, what logic I went through, if we did this, did this, which. She's got it. It doesn't matter what I thought. I'm not going to get anywhere near understanding or knowing the ways of God because his thoughts are so much higher. So even if I've got loftier thoughts, they're so much more higher than mine.
And you know what it does? It actually takes the peace away when you start going through that process, trying to work it all out, because you are now taking control back instead of letting him have control.
So even if I dare to try and work it out, I'm going to fall short. I'm not going to come up with anything that is remotely close to the understanding why. Why this outcome ended the way it did.
Some would say it's unfair. Some would say it's unjust.
And I certainly did at times. So one scripture wasn't enough, so I got hit with another one. You ready for this one? This goes a bit harder. Isaiah 45, 9, 10.
You just need to stop at the first three lines. What sorrow awaits those who argue with their Creator? You know, there's times when you go through difficult times that you do actually want an argument. Why? Come on, God, that's unfair.
I've served you for 30 years. My whole family are in ministry. I've bought up my kids in the ways of God. They will worship youth leaders or worship leaders. I've submitted my whole family to God.
At least you can heal my wife.
What sorrow awaits those who argue with their Creator? Does a clay pot argue with its maker? Does the clay dispute with the one who shapes it, saying, stop, you're doing it wrong?
Does the pot exclaim, how clumsy can you make? How terrible it Would be if a newborn baby said to its father, why was I born Lord Jesus? Or if it said to its mother, why did you make me this way? I mean, that's pretty blunt scripture, isn't it? But you know what it does?
It puts everything back in perspective that he is God Almighty. And there is the point. He is soft sovereign, and there's no arm twisting with God. All there is is submission to the purposes and the will of God. And how do you submit?
You trust his character because he is good. He is good. His sovereignty, if you can follow this, say that his sovereignty is marked by his omnipotence. In other words, his sovereignty is marked by the fact that he is all power. The all knowing, all powerful God of the universe is God Almighty.
He's not God Almighty as we'd like to call him. His sovereignty. When we know that he is all powerful, all knowing and everywhere at the same time. When we get a little bit of a glimpse of the revelation of that, because we can't get it because we don't even understand time. But he's everywhere at the same time, and he's all powerful at the same time and he knows everything at the same time.
When you get a little bit of glimpse of that, you realize, wow, well, who am I to even ask?
Yet he sent his son to die for me. That I could have a relationship with that person who is all powerful, all knowing, really.
His sovereignty helps me stay on course and his sovereignty helps me stay the place of peace. Just knowing that he holds everything in his hand. And even when I've got no idea of what the outcome is, he still got me.
Number three. I've never been more grateful for the church.
I'll just say thank you for being the church. Because when people like me go through hell, when people like me go through difficult times, the church shines like it's never shines before. The meals, the phone calls, the texts, the prayers, the little thoughts that would come in the time of need, that would just sustain you and hold you up. I've never been more grateful for the church.
If you're a person that is involved in doing those things, thank you. You don't know what it does to people who are going through difficult times. Just the little things, just to obey that little voice, just to be obedient to that little thing, to make that phone call, just to send that text. You've got no idea. I also want to speak to people who have taken potshots at the church.
People get hurt in church. I've Hurt people. People have hurt me. We're all broken. We're all on a journey.
I just want to say to you, if you're one that taking potshots, don't, don't. Sometimes we don't like the prayer preacher. I sometimes don't like the preacher either. I don't even like it when I preach sometimes.
There's all sorts of reasons why people will make excuses and have pot shots at the church. But let me say to you, you may never know when you need her.
And if Jesus died and gave his life for her, who are we to take potshot at her? We need to love her. Jesus gave his life for her.
I'll just leave that there.
Fourth thing I realize is God is always, always capital A, always superlative, Always, always working for my good. Always. Romans 8:28. What a great scripture. Scripture.
I've preached the sucker out of this scripture like crazy. And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purposes. It's very interesting. I've preached it, but now I had to live it. This verse is quoted as a throwaway band aid scripture.
When you want to get out of a conversation with someone who's gone through a difficult time, don't worry about brother. All things work together for good.
Been there. Had someone do that to you.
We look at, look closely at this scripture, it says, and we know that God. God causes all things to work together. And we know.
No, do we know? Do we know that? We know that we know that we know. That's where the consistency of going back to God saying, I know you, I know your character, I know you're good and I know you're going to work on this. And no matter the outcome, it's going to be for my good.
All things, not some things. The good, the bad, the bright, the dark, the sweet, the bitter, the easy, the hard, the happy, the sad, the prosperity and the poverty, the health and the sickness, the calm and the storm, the comfort and, and the suffering, the life and the death. He uses everything because they are all things.
God turns everything into good. And you're saying, Steve, are you saying that what happened in your wife passing was good? No, I'm not saying saying it was good.
But God can take that and he can make it powerful if I'm prepared to let him in and do it. He does turn your mourning into dancing. He does turn your sorrow into joy. He does turn your fear into boldness. So no matter what our situation, our suffering Our persecution, our sinful nature, our pain, our lack of faith.
Our Heavenly Father will work and produce victory, victory and blessing in our life if we're prepared to fight, to stay at rest.
The end of chapter eight of Romans says this. Nothing existing or occurring in heaven or on earth shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus. Nothing. Your loved one passing will not separate you from God, nor will God lead you. Your sin doesn't separate you from God.
If you're prepared to bring it back and confess it. There's nothing you can do to separate or lose the love of God in your life. Either that scripture is true or it's not. Either it's true in all circumstances or it's not true at all.
Here's the operative word. He is working. He's working, right? He's not worked. Not done.
He's working. Look at this scripture. This is Philippians 1, verse 6. For I am confident of this very thing that he who began a good what work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus. The problem is we want to begin it and and then we want a perfected next step.
There's a lot of pain in between the beginning and the perfecting.
There's a lot of pain. There's a lot of good. There's also a lot of pain and there's a lot of living. Some of you hearing this today and know that this was five years ago and my new wife is sitting here of two years is she's been. I can tell you she's God's gift to me.
The journey she's been on. Maybe one day you can hear it is not that dissimilar to me with a lost marriage and a loveless marriage and gone through very difficult situations, abuse and all sorts of stuff. Yet God brought both of us together in a time where it's literally multiplied our love for God and our love for each other in a way that I can't accept explain. It's like God heard the cry and the pain and even the loss of my dear wife and God did something on the other side of this. That is beautiful that I can stand here and say to you that have gone through difficult situation.
There is hope on the other side of it. There is joy. It looks different. I feel like a sliding doors moment. I've never seen that movie.
I'm living in the same body but living a different life.
Have you ever eaten a cake? Who likes cake?
You know, you can eat cake two ways. You can eat it after it comes out of the oven. Or you can eat it ingredient by ingredient. It's your choice.
I can lay them all up. Here's ingredients. And if you're not prepared to let God do, do with what he wants to in life, because all those ingredients go into a cake and what do they do? They work together and then eventually it goes through the heat and something beautiful comes out of it, right? Or you can resist God.
You'd say, no problem. Here's some flour.
Eat that. Here's some bicarb soda. You'll love that. Oh, you're not enjoying that? Oh, great.
Here's some raw egg.
Had some raw egg moments in your life before, right? We can concentrate on those moments. Or if we're actually prepared to sit back and let God work them together and then put them into the heat and furnace of life, something beautiful is going to come out of it. And you know what's interesting about that? That cake's not for you to eat.
It's actually for all the other people in your life that can see the goodness of God. God. And you see the glory of God manifest in you.
Musicians, please come. Ah, by the way, do you want to see a picture of my family now? Have a look at this.
I had three daughters and now have a son. Son. This young Fellow Here is A.J. he's 15. And then my other three daughters there with grandkids.
I've got four grandkids. And quietly I've got one on the way. So there you go. Elder. Elder is out here in Australia.
This is the beautiful thing, right? Elder is here. She's the only one of her family here in Australia. She's from Mexico, lived here for 21 years. Only one here.
Her mum's not here, her brother's not here, her sister's not here. She has no other family but her son. She wanted grandkids. She wanted a whole family. She, she.
I mean, you go back to Mexico with her mate. It's crazy like that. You don't even ask your family to go out. You go out for dinner, they just rock up, right? It's just everywhere.
And the cry of her heart was, God, I want a family.
My last point, you know, eternity is closer than what you think.
I grew up in the day of. Some of you all relate to this. Of the hellfire and brimstone preachers.
I got saved every Sunday night for about a year when I was a kid. If you leave here tonight and you get hit by a bus, you're going to heaven or to hell.
Some of you are laughing. You know exactly what I'm talking about happened, right? If you go to that picture theater and Jesus comes back, you're not going.
That's what was preached in my pulpit when I was a kid. Bad theology, but boy made me come to the altar and give my life to Jesus every Sunday night.
But what I saw in the eight hours of my. The last eight hours of my late wife sue was a room filled with the presence of God, her family just taking time just to tell her how much she meant to us, how much we love her.
We thanked her for what she did for our family and the wife she was and the mother she was and the grandmother she was. We went around the room and we worshiped God in there together. She got on FaceTime and rang her mum on FaceTime. Her mum died at 103. I thought sue would be burying me.
I never thought I'd be burying my wife with those genes. She thanked her mum, she rang her best friend who had been her. Her friend since she was six, and thanked her for loving her. She rang her sister who grew up in the church, who got an incredible accurate prophetic gift and would prophesy in church, but her marriage broke down and the church turned on her and she got really hurt, you know, did you see this? That gift doesn't stop.
Do you know? Did you know? I rang her up to tell her about Elder. My wife, Sister, sister. And she said, don't tell me, don't tell me.
She's got dark hair, she's of ethnicity, this ethnicity, and she's younger than you. I said, how do you know all that? I just had a dream about it the other night and she had a little boy. That prophetic gift, gifts of God just continues, right? Amazing.
But she hasn't been to church for 30 years.
But when you're sitting in a room and you see the heartbeat of your wife going from 130 to flatlining and you see her grasping for air and to take that last breath, you realize eternity is closer than to think. It's not out there. Eternity is not out. It's right here. We.
Right here we take our next breath by the grace of God.
And if you don't know Jesus, I want to give you that opportunity to know him. The wonderful thing about that room was everyone in that room knew Jesus. We worshiped Jesus. She knew exactly where she was going. There was hope.
And there was a confidence in my wife's heart that she knew Jesus and she knew she was going to. To meet him when she took her last breath. I laid my hands on her chest. Kids, gather. And we're bawling our eyes out, praying for her, thanking her and saying, jesus, take her.
As her spirit left her body.
It was the most beautiful and the most painful experience all wrapped into one that I've ever had.
But if you don't know Jesus, I want to tell you, you can know him today. And you can walk out of here confident that the next breath you take, if it's taken from you, the next breath you're taking will be taken in glory, that you'll be with him.
Luke9.25 says this. What good is it for someone to gain the whole world lose and forfeit their very soul if you don't know Jesus, you could know him today. If you're like my sister in law and you've been hurt by the church and you found yourself here today, I want to tell you we love you. Jesus loves you. You're not here by chance to hear this message.
Jesus loves you enough to orchestrate this whole thing that you're here to hear that he loves you and he wants to heal the pain. And can I say on behalf of the church, we're sorry for you've been hurt. We're sorry.
I don't know where your circumstances are. You may not even be confident of your salvation because you've just started to meander away from God. I've just realized at that moment, I realized this life here is just a prequel to the real life that we're going to live with him. It's a prequel. We've got an opportunity.
And right now, today you have an opportunity. And God is giving you an opportunity to say yes to Him. What will your next breath look like? Will it be one that you take, take in glory, knowing that you're going to be with Him? I want to give everyone here an opportunity to say yes to Jesus.
This is what we're going to do. In a moment, I'm going to ask for all eyes to be closed, heads to be bowed, and I'm going to count to three and ask you to raise your hand and say yes. Steve, I actually want to get to know Jesus. I've been away from him or I don't know him. I've been hurt by the church.
Whatever your circumstances, you know, you don't have that assurance in your heart like my wife had that assurance. She just knew that she knew that she knew. If you don't know that you know that, you know that you're going to be with him then I want to give you the opportunity this morning to say yes.
I want that assurance. I want to live a life with him. I want to get my life back. I just track again. If that's you this morning, I'm going to ask your eyes to be closed, your head to be bowed.
On the count of three, I'm going to ask you to lift your hands. There are some friends around can help me point you out after, after this, we want to give you a Bible, want you to help you on your journey. But if that's you this morning, at the count of three, just quickly lift your hand. 1, 2, 3. Where are those hands?
Wow. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9. People everywhere. Come on, let's thank God for what God's doing. That's you, quickly lift your hand.
Just keep your hand up please. Just keep your hand up. That's you, keep your hand up. Wonderful. For everyone who's raised their hand, we want to give you a Bible, please.
Pastor Adrian will give you direction after the meeting of how to come and get that. We want to help you on the journey. But what I want to do is pray with you. Can we all pray to together? And if this is you, you put your hand up, please.
Pray this from the depths of your heart. Jesus saw your hand. He knows where you're at and he's listening. So let's say this together. Dear Jesus, thank you for loving me.
Thank you that your plans for me are good. Thank you for dying on the cross. I confess of my sin. I need you in my life. Come into my life.
Be my Savior, be my Lord. In Jesus name I pray. Amen. Come on. Can we thank God for what he's just done.
Before we move on? We're going to pray for some people in a moment and give an opportunity for people who are journeying just to help strengthen them. But here's a photo of my little four year old Olive who went through that difficult time. She wants to be a doctor. She's gorgeous.
She's the sassiest little kid. My goodness me, you can see it all over her face. But there stands a miracle of the grace of God. We lost the life of her grand grandma, but God saved her life so that we could preach. You know, her mum preached about the journey last Sunday at a church and here I am preaching about her mum today.
God is good. Hey, can we stand to our feet if God is speaking? If you're going through a difficult time and you just want to be strengthened this morning, just want someone to stand with you, pray for you, encourage you. When I went through this time, I nearly was out at every altar call. Believe me, just to be encouraged.
But if you need us to instill courage in you this morning and pray for you as we sing this song, come out. We want to spend some time with you and pray for you.
Up my hands and praise you again and again. Cuz all that I have is a hallelujah Hallelujah and I know it's not much of nothing else save for a king except for a heart singing hallelu as the past has come, as the pastors come Hallelujah so I throw out my hand praise you again and again Cause all that I have is a hallelujah Hallelujah and I know it's not But I'm nothing else before a king except for heart singing Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah oh hallelujah oh hallelujah.
Don't come on by oh don't you get shy on me to stop your cause you've got a lion inside of those lungs get off pathways the Lord that's the church you worship so come on my soul oh don't you get shy on me Lift up your song Cause you've got a lion inside of those lungs get out step away the Lord.
Come on my soul oh don't you get shy on me.
Come on my soul Come on my throat oh don't you get shy on me Lift up your tong Cuz you got a lion inside of get up and praise the Lord no, I throw out my hand Praise you again and again all that I have is Hallelujah Hallelujah.
Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah.
Hallelujah.
Oh we worship you.
Oh we worship you Jesus.
No one like you oh there's no one like you.
Worthy, you were worthy, you are worthy, you will be forever Yahweh Worthy, you are worthy, you are worthy, you will be forever Yahweh Worthy, worthy, you are worthy, you are worthy, you will be forever Yahweh Worthy, you are worthy, you are worthy, you will be forever worthy, you were worthy, you are worthy, you will be forever forever I pray Worthy, you are worthy, you are worthy, you will be forever Yahweh Worthy, you are worthy, you are worthy, you will be forever Yahweh Worthy, you are worthy, you are worthy, you will be forever Yahweh Worthy, you are worthy, you are worthy, you will be forever Yahweh worthy you worthy you are worthy you will be forever.
Praise you again and again Cause all that I have is a hallelujah hallelujah and I know it's not much I'm nothing else here for king except for I singing hallelujah hallelujah Hallelujah.
Hallelujah hallelujah hallelujah hallelujah hallelujah hallelujah again Shy on me Lift up your song Cuz you got a lion inside of those lion get off that br.
Oh don't you get shy on me Lift up your throne Cause you got a lion in.
You know, God's ministering to people all across the front and I'm sure across this place may be watching online. You know what a powerful, authentic, vulnerable word. Hey. And I'm just going to get Steve to come up for a second. He's just going to pray for us.
And maybe you've been up the front, maybe you haven't, you've been there, but you know, we know some of you know exactly what he's talking about. That vulnerable time and you're holding on to God, you've gone through it. Maybe God wants to use your life to minister to someone. Maybe he wants to lift you up. Maybe he didn't come out the front because, you know, a bit nervous about it or you're not sure.
But God says, I love you and I've got you and so all over this place. If we can close our eyes and we're just going to reach out to the Lord and say, God, we need your grace, we need your peace. We need your presence to go with us. Why don't you reach out to him right now, Father? God, for every person that is going through a difficult season, for every person whose hope is diminished, Father, I pray that this testimony of our family will infuse hope, infuse faith, and Lord, will bring courage to their soul.
Pray God, that they turn to the word. Lord, I pray God, that they trust your sovereignty. Give them a revelation of your sovereignty. Father, I pray that the questions of why, why, why will diminish, Lord, and those questions of why will turn to statements of faith and praise. That praise will be their language, not questions of why.
Father I pray, Lord, that even though they feel as though they need answers, God, the answer is found in your character. And I pray, God, that people will start to test, bring, test testimonies of his character. Lord, in the way of provision and hope and joy that's entered their life. Father, I pray that the peace of God, Lord, that will guard our heart to the point where we don't understand why we're so at peace. God, it will just be flowing out of us.
Because God, we trust you in all things. So Father, we declare your word over our lives, we declare your word over this church, we declare your word over every circumstance. God that will turn to you, will trust you, God will know that you are in control and God that God is good all the time. In Jesus name, Amen. Amen.
Hey, and why don't we give Steve and Elder a hand for being with us and being willing to share.
So a couple of things and we're finishing up. Thank you for being with us as we had some extended time of worship and prayer. If you put your hand up to give your life to Jesus or rededicate your life, we've got a Bible. We want to give you a brand new Bible. And out in the foyer near where the bookshop area is, there's some glass doors there you'll see a sign that says Bibles.
And can we please go there, ask some, say, hey, I'm here to get a Bible. And we would very happily and lovingly we'd love to give you one. And we want to help you in your journey with Christ because he's got a relationship he wants with you and it changes your life. We need him. I need him, you need him.
And we want to help you in this beautiful group of people. So go get a Bible. We want to help you. And the other thing is this. Steve and Elder, they've entered into a, like he was saying, a whole new life life.
And it's a new ministry that's opened up. They're helping churches like us in developing and buildings and decorating them and getting all kinds of things. They're doing ministry in different churches, but it's a step of faith. It's been a big step of faith. And so we want to bless them and in this new journey together as they stepped out in faith to be used by God.
So can I encourage you if this has been a blessing and you're able to. We do something in our church when we have guests like this. We, we like to give them a love offering and we say this is a, we call it a love offering because it's out of an act of love, saying, hey, we want to bless your lives. We want to say thank you for building into us and we want to sow into the future of, of what God's got for you and how you're going to impact many more lives. And so if you'd like to do that, there's ways to give up there.
Just put in there love offering, guest offering. If you need an envelope, just grab an envelope at the door and you can hand it in at the Get Connected desk. And I think it'd be great to just be able to bless them as they go home from us. So that'll cool. Thank you, guys.
Thank you for those who responded. God loves you. He has got amazing plans for your life. We got morning tea in the cafe out there. God bless your church.
Have a great rest of the day. See you young adults tonight.
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I'm not religious — is this kind of service actually for someone like me?
Absolutely. This particular sermon was delivered by a guest speaker, Ps Steve Hilder, who shared the real story of losing his wife to cancer, his daughter nearly losing her life during pregnancy, and how he wrestled honestly with doubt, fear, and unanswered questions. It wasn't polished or preachy — it was raw and human. If you've ever faced something hard and wondered whether there's something more to hold onto, that's exactly the kind of person this message was for.
Do I need to know anything about the Bible or Christianity before I come?
Not at all. Connect Christian Church in Frankston welcomes people at every stage — including those with no church background whatsoever. The sermon covered ideas like grief, hope, peace, and purpose in a way that any person going through a hard time could connect with, regardless of where they're at spiritually.
I've been through a really painful loss. Is it okay to show up still carrying that?
Yes — and you'd be in good company. Ps Steve spoke openly about the grief of losing his wife of 37 years and said something that stuck: grief can't be told what to do, and it will come when you least expect it. He didn't offer easy answers or a quick fix. He shared what actually helped him find peace in the middle of pain, not just after it.
What if I have serious doubts or questions about God? Am I welcome?
Yes. Ps Steve was refreshingly honest that he doesn't have all the answers — even after 30 years in ministry. He described his own moments of crying out, "Help me with my unbelief." Doubt isn't a disqualifier at Connect. It's actually part of the honest conversation that happens here.
I've had a bad experience with church before. Why would this be any different?
Ps Steve spoke directly to this in the sermon — acknowledging that churches hurt people and that people hurt each other. He didn't brush past it. The culture at Connect is one of openness and grace rather than judgement or performance. If you've been burned before, you're not alone, and you're still welcome to come and see for yourself.
Is this the kind of church where I'll be pressured to do or say certain things?
No. There's no pressure to participate in anything you're not comfortable with. You're welcome to simply come, sit, listen, and take it all in. The sermon was an invitation, not a demand — and the same goes for showing up on a Sunday.
I'm going through anxiety or a really dark season right now. Can church actually help with that?
Ps Steve spoke honestly about the grip of anxiety — describing the moment he read his wife's cancer prognosis and could barely breathe. He shared how a specific kind of peace, not the world's version but something deeper, became real to him in the middle of that darkness. He wasn't selling a formula — he was sharing what he lived. If you're in a hard season right now, you won't find judgement here. You'll find people who get it.
What actually happens at a Connect service? What should I expect?
A typical Sunday includes contemporary worship music, a practical and honest message, and time for prayer. It's relaxed and welcoming — not stiff or overly formal. The Frankston location is at 135 Golf Links Road, Frankston South. Services run on Sunday mornings and there's also a young adults gathering on Sunday evenings. Morning tea in the café afterwards gives you a chance to meet people without any awkwardness.
I'm not sure I believe in God, but I'm curious. Is it weird to come along?
Not at all — curiosity is a great reason to come. Ps Steve's story raises questions that most people have thought about at some point: Why do good people suffer? Is there something beyond this life? Does faith actually hold up when everything falls apart? You don't need answers before you walk in the door. Plenty of people in the room are still working through the same questions.
What if I come and realise church isn't for me?
That's okay. There's no obligation and no follow-up pressure. Coming once doesn't commit you to anything. But if the story Ps Steve shared resonated with you at all — the grief, the hope, the question of whether God is actually good — it might be worth giving it a proper chance. A lot of people who now call Connect home showed up for the first time not entirely sure why.
Related Bible Verses
Philippians 4:6–7
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
📖 Read Philippians 4:6–7 on Bible.com →John 14:27
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.
📖 Read John 14:27 on Bible.com →Hebrews 4:10–11
For anyone who enters God's rest also rests from their works, just as God did from his. Let us, therefore, make every effort to enter that rest, so that no one will perish by following their example of disobedience.
📖 Read Hebrews 4:10–11 on Bible.com →Mark 9:23–24
"If you can?" said Jesus. "Everything is possible for one who believes." Immediately the boy's father exclaimed, "I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!"
📖 Read Mark 9:23–24 on Bible.com →Isaiah 55:8–9
"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the Lord. "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts."
📖 Read Isaiah 55:8–9 on Bible.com →Isaiah 45:9–10
"What sorrow awaits those who argue with their Creator. Does a clay pot argue with its maker? Does the clay dispute with the one who shapes it, saying, 'Stop, you're doing it wrong!' Does the pot exclaim, 'How clumsy can you be?' How terrible it would be if a newborn baby said to its father, 'Why was I born?' or if it said to its mother, 'Why did you make me this way?'"
📖 Read Isaiah 45:9–10 on Bible.com →Romans 8:28
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
📖 Read Romans 8:28 on Bible.com →Romans 8:38–39
For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
📖 Read Romans 8:38–39 on Bible.com →Philippians 1:6
Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
📖 Read Philippians 1:6 on Bible.com →Luke 9:25
What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit their very self?
📖 Read Luke 9:25 on Bible.com →